Everyone wants to be honest, but dating breeds lies. We have all been there. A person says that they are interested in a serious relationship and then they disappear after a few weeks of dating or after you had sex. You thought you had a great connection but then suddenly they drop off the face of the earth. Sometimes they break up with a text or leave a message on your phone when they know you aren’t going to answer. What is that about? Sometimes they lie about whether they had a good time and that they will call. They act interested but then you never hear from them or they don't return your calls. You wish someone would just tell you how they feel, but  secretly we may prefer to not know the truth. This behavior all comes down to one thing…fear of confrontation. Somewhere along the line we have all been told how to behave, when to share and when to shut up. Most of us have been conditioned to avoid the truth because we don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings OR we don’t want people to challenge us on our truth because we don’t have enough confidence in ourselves. We hide behind the mask, but attract what we avoid. The problem with white lies is that you really think you are being nice. I remember a time when I met this guy who was really great but I just wasn’t interested and I was afraid to hurt him. I kept stringing him along because I hoped he would eventually lose interest and go away.  What I realized was that I wasn’t being nice at all. I was actually being mean. When I finally told him the truth he said, “Thank you. At least now I know where I stand and can move on. I appreciate your honesty.” That broke an old pattern of mine where I would just not return phone calls but, at the same time, complained about men who did that to me. It was liberating to just say what I really felt. Honest communication with a man...wow.